here's today's laff, from Richard Cleroux:
While walking down the street one day a "Member of Parliament" is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.
'Welcome to heaven,' says St. Peter. 'Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see such a high government official around these parts,so we're not quite sure what to do with you.'
'No problem, just let me in,' says the MP.
'Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higherup. What we'll do is have you spend one day inhell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity.'
'Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven,' says the MP.
'I'm sorry, but we have our rules.'
And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his old friends and other politicians who had worked with him.
Everyone is very happy and in evening dress.They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the public.
They play a friendly game of golf and then dineon lobster, caviar and champagne.
Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly & nice guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a goodtime that before he realizes it, it is time to go.
Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves goodbye while the elevator rises...
The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens in heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him.
'Now it's time to visit heaven.'
So, 24 hours pass with the MP joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.
'Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now its time to choose your eternity.'
The MP reflects for a minute and then answers: 'Well, I would never have thought that I would say this but, I mean heaven has been delightful, however I think I would be better off in hell.'
So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and hegoes down, down, down to hell.
Now when the doors of the elevator open he finds himself in the middle of a barren, waste land covered with garbage.
He notices all his friends, now dressed in rags, picking up garbage and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above.
The devil comes over to him and puts an arm around his shoulder. 'I don't understand,' stammers the MP. 'I was here yesterday and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. Whatever happened?' he asked.
The devil smiles at him and says, 'Yesterday we were campaigning.. ..
Today you voted.'